last day of march

So many ups and downs since i've started work. Didn't expect that I would have the chance to experience all the unexpected. Basically, everyday is a new challenge to me. No matter how nice I plan my work, there is sure 1 or 2 fantastic-bombastic event occurs.

I used to not-to-care my actions, I would follow my direction and my own style of doing things. I've never ever think of all the consequences of my action. I've never think of how others feel. Perhaps I'm selfish, in fact I am.

Just lost a friend of mine, and didnt expect that he would end his life like that. Didnt know him long though, 2 months+. But he is the only one in the company whom I respected the most. He is a 60 yrs old plus uncle. He was a bachelor and was staying alone. Due to closing down of the company and didnt get a sen afta being retrenched (thanks to the stupid fucker directors), he choosed to end his life. I used to advised him when he was still in the company, chit chat awhile with him before he goes for lunch and afta he back from lunch.

Well, I dunno how to describe my feeling now. I thought by sharing things out and nothing is unsolvable. But sometimes we do have to face the reality, and for the past 23 years, I've been living on my own imagination, thought everything also 'no problem'. Everything can cincai punya, everything also is tak apa punya.

But NO !!! Don't be optimistic, don't be pessimistic, be realistic.

I'm growing up everyday. THanks for the opportunity to experience all the abovementioned events.